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Rantings of a Sandmonkey

Be forewarned: The writer of this blog is an extremely cynical, snarky, pro-US, secular, libertarian, disgruntled sandmonkey. If this is your cup of tea, please enjoy your stay here. If not, please sod off

Monday, August 22, 2005

No one can kiss ass like us

So here I am coming out of the bathroom after taking a shower, and I spot a newspaper on top of our newspapers stack that had headlines so priceless that I just had to share with y'all. The newspaper is the state-owned Akhbar El Youm, which is the weekly version of the daily "Al Akhbar" newspaper. Momtaz El Kott, the Editor in chief of Akhbar El Youm, was becoming a legendary name in Egyptian circles for his tireless ass-kissing efforts, and now I can see why. Let me share with you some of the frontpage headlines so you can see what I mean: Mubarak to the NDP leadership: Egypt's democratic experiment will lead the region. ( He apparently missed the whole Iraq and Lebanon elections thing) International News Agencies: Egyptian Youth favor the NDP candidate. 100% of the polled have absolute trust that Mubarak will win in a unprecedented landslide. (100%? not a single one doubts it? Wow, why even have an election then?) Mubarak announces that there are specific programs that will provide 4 million new job opportunities for egypt's youth. ( 4 million new jobs? Bush should call this guy. He can fix that economy like that) 7000 NDP conferences all over Egypt today. (Holy Cow) Akhbar El Youm Poll: 69.8% believe that the Elections will be free, valid and unforged. ( The remaining 30% apparently have experienced voting before.) And then there was that one headline, that just stroke me as the ultimate punchline for this joke of a newspaper: All of the presidential candidates have all agreed that the Egyptian Media is fair and balanced and doesn't favor one candidate or party over the other. LOL

4 Comments:

At 8/21/2005 10:33:00 PM, Blogger Kat said...

Dude...how do you keep your sanity with this stuff? the APU strikes again.

 
At 8/22/2005 12:23:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

Come on. This is like reading the Onion, only it's not trying to be funny. Hmm...

Gotta love the APU!

 
At 8/22/2005 03:53:00 AM, Blogger Kat said...

I'd laugh but I know somewhere over there, there are at least a couple hundred thousand (maybe millions) who actually believe this stuff. At least everyone knows that the onion is a spoof.

 
At 8/22/2005 02:49:00 PM, Anonymous Me, myself and I said...

we do not have public polling so it is difficult to say the percentage who believe this shit..none of the people i know do...regardless of their educational, economic or social backgroud...i am not even sure the cronies and assholes around him believe it...so do not worry..there are no millions who do..at the end of the day, believe me we are more sophisticated than we appear to be. many if not most of the people see through this crap..not doing anything about it is a different story..

 

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