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Rantings of a Sandmonkey

Be forewarned: The writer of this blog is an extremely cynical, snarky, pro-US, secular, libertarian, disgruntled sandmonkey. If this is your cup of tea, please enjoy your stay here. If not, please sod off

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Call me Oracle Sandmonkey

A lot of you do not know that I am a psychic, but I am. I am an Oracle, I can see the future. Here are my predictions regarding tommorow's elections: 1) Mubarak will win by an overhelming majority, altough none of the 99% shit that went one before, because it won't look good like that. It will be a percentage over 63% but no way over 78%. 2) Nooman Gomaa will come in second, just barely in the double digits, thus making him the official Opposition leader in Egypt. He will also receive just slightly less than 5 % in the parliamentary elections, thus ensuring that the Party would have the prestige of being the largest opposition, but not the ability to run in future elections. 3) Ayman Nour will come in 3rd, getting a very small percentage of the vote, deeming him insignificant on the national and international level. Afterwards he will be sentenced in his trial and convicted before the parliamentary elections. He will receive a 3 year jail-sentence, thus be made an example out of. 4) In 3 years, after Bush is out of the Office and the leftists in the USA made enough noise about how his policies "made the world hate the USA"( like the US was loved before that), the person elected will be more understanding and diplomatic and definitely won't be following the "Bush Doctrine" of agressive democracy in the Middle East. Mubarak will resign, and the NDP will run his son as their candidate and win, since no one else qualifies as a contender. Gamal Mubarak will win and beocmes the new President of Egypt, much to his Mommy's delight. Have a nice day, and remember: In a rigged election, your vote , truly, doesn't count!


At 9/06/2005 09:12:00 AM, Anonymous brenda said...

If you're psychic sandmonkey man, can you PLEASE tell me who I am going to marry and when? Oh and can you tell me when that idiot I talk about all the time on my blog is going down...??? Pleeeeeeeeeease :)

At 9/06/2005 09:14:00 AM, Anonymous Me, Myself and I said...

Agree with your predictions..excpet for that of jailing ANour..do not think this will happen...Tempted to think that Nour would come second..but that will make him more significant than Gomaa..so probably would not be allowed. Oh well we shall see..it is a depressing but real scenario though..but what do we know...the prez might again surprise us..he did surprise us with article 76..i think he did surprise himself...

At 9/06/2005 10:25:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

Brenda, Me thinks you will be married within 2 years from now, to a dude that doesn't even know the meaning of the word "blog". Me fears the idiot you talk about may never go down, but at least he will never get anywhere either. So at least that's something!

At 9/06/2005 10:29:00 AM, Blogger Papa Ray said...


Did you forget about the assassination?

At 9/06/2005 01:24:00 PM, Blogger stefania said...

What about me, Sam ?

Don't tell me that I will become a leftist !!!!


At 9/06/2005 03:36:00 PM, Anonymous brenda said...

But I am soooooo old already! Ah well. Patience is a virtue I guess.

And you're right. He probably won't go down. Ugh. I really don't wish that. Just wish for him to miserably miss me someday (hatching evil success-is-the-best-revenge fantasy as I type).

Peace everyone.

Oh yeah. I forgot where I am! This is not a hippie leftist blog ;)

At 9/06/2005 05:14:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Vote Early and Often for Curley!

At 9/06/2005 05:15:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Previous quote of a campaign song for the late Mayor of Boston and Governor of Massachusetts (elected while in jail) was from

Michael in Framingham

At 9/06/2005 05:49:00 PM, Blogger newc said...

Who said ANYONE is going to forget?
Democrats forget, I know this. But I will not.

Watching with you my Brother.

At 9/10/2005 11:44:00 AM, Blogger Vox Populi - Agent Provocateur said...

He got 88%! You are so busted man!


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