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Rantings of a Sandmonkey

Be forewarned: The writer of this blog is an extremely cynical, snarky, pro-US, secular, libertarian, disgruntled sandmonkey. If this is your cup of tea, please enjoy your stay here. If not, please sod off

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Ahmeddinjad is an economic genius

The Iranian stock market has been in a downward spiral ever since A.J. took over the reins of the Iranian presidency because, well, he is crazy, and the fact that he called it gambeling , which Islam forbids. The effect of his words and actions created an unprecetended effect on the market. Nervous investors have been transferring their capital to other countries, and Dubai has benefited palpably from the flight of capital from Iran. The Tehran Stock Exchange has lost 20 percent of its value in the past four months.“At the moment there are no buyers in this market, only sellers”, the newspaper Ruznet wrote. “Economists believe the situation is becoming more difficult to handle day by day”. So what's our boy's soloution to all of this? A quite ingenius one actually: Hang people! Iran’s hard-line President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad told the latest cabinet meeting in the Iranian capital that “if we were permitted to hang two or three persons, the problems with the stock exchange would be solved for ever”, according to a Tehran-based newspaper. Ahmadinejad was addressing a cabinet meeting held to discuss the rapidly deteriorating situation at the Tehran Stock Exchange, the daily Ruznet reported on Sunday. Ministers and experts disagreed with all the different views and proposals raised at the meeting, which came to an end without any concrete results. Tempers flew high and participants shouted at each other during the discussion, according to the daily. Frustrated with the inability of his economic advisers and experts to come up with any solution, Ahmadinejad told them that the only way out of the current stock exchange and financial market problems was to “frighten” speculators by hanging two or three of them. Fantastic.


At 11/26/2005 04:55:00 AM, Blogger shoprat said...

Yeah, killing a few people would definitely get things rolling wouldn't it. At the rate this person (won't call him a man) is going, Iran will be a heavily armed slum. or is it one already?

At 11/26/2005 08:27:00 AM, Blogger programmer craig said...

He was only kidding!

At 11/26/2005 11:32:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

How do you know that to be a fact? With A.j. i am sure you can be so positive he is kidding, u know? Not to mention, that's some pretty messed up humor to begin with, no?

At 11/26/2005 03:33:00 PM, Blogger programmer craig said...

Well, SM, it's like this... he said just today that he wants the Bush administration tried by the UN as war criminals. What can it be when the President of a country that claims to want peace says something like that about the President of the country he wants peace with? Except a joke?

At 11/26/2005 08:38:00 PM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...


At 11/26/2005 10:13:00 PM, Anonymous Peter-Australia said...

Nothing like killing people to give the ones that are left confidence to take risks, NOT!!!

Other things he plans on fixing by killing people:

Education (bloody teachers just don't try hard enough)

Sanitation (a few good hangings will stop people littering)

Public Transport (start a good old slaughter and watch take up on public transport to soar; only problem is it will be focussed on lines heading to borders and only one way movement is to be expected. Short term solution only)

At 11/27/2005 09:15:00 AM, Anonymous Jordan from Left Canada said...

Even the Umans are nervious about A.J. (you really have to be crazy to make them think "hey, this islamists guys is nuts")

I wonder where the Republican Guard (bastards) will side with if the Umans decide to bolt on this guy. This could become a very serious civil strife (if not war)

AJ gives the jihadists wet dreams, but makes the 80% "sick of this crap" secular Iranian community (which held a candilite vigil after 911) searching for Canadian passports. (lucky enough my girlfriend found one)

At 1/06/2006 11:44:00 AM, Anonymous OHenry said...

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