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Rantings of a Sandmonkey

Be forewarned: The writer of this blog is an extremely cynical, snarky, pro-US, secular, libertarian, disgruntled sandmonkey. If this is your cup of tea, please enjoy your stay here. If not, please sod off

Thursday, February 23, 2006

This just feeds my ego

Yasmina and POBE keep pawning me off to eachother, and it's not like I even asked any of them to marry me. Hmm.. Ok, here is the plan guys: Me, and both of you will get married in Egypt, where it's ok for me to marry 4 girls at the same time (Sweet, ain't it? What's Sharia's take on threesomes? Anyone knows? I am fraid to ask my Imam!). Then, I will go to the US and marry Yasmina, who will then go to canada and marry POBE, because gay marriages there are allowed. POBE will then meet me in Australia, where I will immigrate to if the whole US job thing doesn't fall through (it ain't looking good) where we will get married there. This way we can all get the american, the canadian, the asutralian, the egyptian and the british passport (you know who you are) and then spend the rest of our lives in prison for polygamy in about all the english speaking countries. Sounds good to me girls, does it sound good to you? Let me know!

13 Comments:

At 2/24/2006 12:24:00 AM, Anonymous A. said...

Sorry, I can't help asking:

1) I've read that a high percentage of Egyptian women are circumcised. Does this only apply to rural, backward populations, or could it happen that an elegant Cairo girl tells you after your first time: "Well, darling, if I didn't come, it wasn't exactly your fault ..."

2) Today, which Arab countries allow more than 1 wife? And even if legally possible, where is it really put into practice? E.g., do you know personally families with more than one wife?

Thanks for answering my curiousness

A.

 
At 2/24/2006 01:32:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

Hey A., Don't worry, the fact that you asked such depressing questions on what I thought was my funny post of the day- thus ensuring that the comments following it will be serious and not funny- is nothing to apologize for. After all, we are here to inform and educate. (grrr.......)

1) Female circumsicion- or as I like to call it by its real name Female genital mutilation- is actually mostly found in the rural parts of Egypt and almost never in cairo. However, since that's where the majority of egypt lives, I am afraid and ashamed to say that it is widespread and that many girls have to go through this inhumane procedure on daily basis in Egypt and other african countries.

2)All arab countries allow more than one wife today (Iraq used to be the exception under Saddam, but now things are chnaging). It's applied to practice till this day, but since it's expensive, and women usually throw a hissy fit, it's not as widespread as some men would like it to be. So it is kind of rare, but it does happen.

One of my good friends from highschool had a father who married at least twice, and had 2 of the wives living together actually: His mother, who was 60 something, and the new wife, 20 something and the mother of his new 5 eyar old brother. That kid now has a brother in his 50's and a brother who is 5, and he is 25. Imagine that!

 
At 2/24/2006 02:06:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sandmonkey, you forgot about your next wife, you know..the one who is 2 metres tall and weighs 120 kilos. The one called Bruce who you will marry in prison. You'll really have something to blog about then soap boy !

 
At 2/24/2006 02:18:00 AM, Anonymous A. said...

Sandmonkey -

thanks for answering. Another gender question: I do remember Libyan female fighter pilots and Qathafi's personal bodyguard comprised by female specialists. But apart from Libya, are there other Arab countries with female soldiers?

A.

 
At 2/24/2006 03:51:00 AM, Blogger Kat said...

Yeah, I'll answer the female soldier question:

jordan
Iran has some, though they seem more like special "militant" groups. There was a photo going around of these chicks in full Abaya (or Chador or whatever the Iranian version is) repelling down a building. Pretty funny, but still...

Iraq now has female soldiers (though, they may have had some before, not sure). The Peshmerga from Kurdistan has had female soldiers for a long time.

That's what I know off the top of my head.

 
At 2/24/2006 05:56:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kat & others. Australia has female fighter pilots (F/A18 Hornet) as well as helicopter pilots and I think that some of them fly gunships. they are also allowed to be 'front line support' ie communications etc but what it means in reality is that they are in a combat role if needed and things are turning to crap in a fight. Couple of more years and they will have full combat role.bw

 
At 2/24/2006 06:20:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'll try again and sorry if this runs twice, my commodore64 has been playing up. Kat & others. Australia..FA/18 fighter pilots as well as helicopters and I think that some of them fly gunships. they are also allowed to be 'front line support' ie communications etc but what it really means in reality is that they are in a combat role if needed and things are turning to crap in a fight. Couple of more years and they will have a full combat role. you go girl. bw

 
At 2/24/2006 06:28:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

A. see what you have done? We are talking female soldiers here now.

Goddamn it! *sulks*

 
At 2/24/2006 06:53:00 AM, Anonymous A. said...

Sandmonkey -

aargh, you're right, ashes on my head. (But my bad conscience is limited, since I think the really interesting commentaries to your double proposal won't be in the commentary section but rather as private mail :-P )

 
At 2/24/2006 07:06:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

but sandmonkey, we need female soldiers. who else would mend the uniforms and put new curtains in the barracks.BW...he he he

 
At 2/24/2006 07:11:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ow, just got smacked on the back of the head and not in cyberspace. forgot that all Australian warships and submarines have females as crew...total equality in being shot here in Oz(our term for Australia just in case).BW

 
At 2/24/2006 01:49:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

thanks for answering. Another gender question: I do remember Libyan female fighter pilots and Qathafi's personal bodyguard comprised by female specialists. But apart from Libya, are there other Arab countries with female soldiers?

There are female soldiers in Lebanon, but it's rare. Polygamy is allowed in Lebanon, but nof for Christians (unfair!)

 
At 2/24/2006 09:31:00 PM, Blogger elengil said...

Nah, just live in Utah, then you won't even have to worry about the polygamy. :D

 

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