The Chickenshit Academy Awards!
A lot of people, including fallafel lover Bill O'reilley, were anticipating this year Aacademy Awards to be a place where Blue America and Red America would resume fighting their so called "Culture war". The Battle this time is over which Movie should get the best Picture / best director nods: The Passion of the Christ or Fehrenheit 9/11? The red states wanted Mel Gibson to win for Jesus and the blue states wanted Michael Moore to win, cause they really wanna win something. Apparently some people thought the Oscars were a place to continue last November's election for the "soul of America" or something. They apparently forgot that the Oscars are political above all else and that they would never try to appease half of america over the other half. It's a ratings thing. So, being the chickenshit cowards that they are, they decided on a compromise: they won't nominate either one for anything! Wouldn't want anything taking the focus off who is wearing what on the runway now, do we?