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Rantings of a Sandmonkey

Be forewarned: The writer of this blog is an extremely cynical, snarky, pro-US, secular, libertarian, disgruntled sandmonkey. If this is your cup of tea, please enjoy your stay here. If not, please sod off

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Feed Lindsay Lohan

Screw all of those African aid concerts and movements; here is finally a cause worthy of my support! Go and sign the petition here, and remember:



At 7/05/2005 07:05:00 AM, Anonymous Layla said...


That girl needs Jesus in her life!

At 7/05/2005 07:05:00 AM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...

Ooook! I was going for food here, but whatever works! lol

At 7/05/2005 10:27:00 AM, Blogger Polly Prissy-Pants said...

I knooooow. I miss her old school Lohan-Boobies.

At 7/05/2005 02:35:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well I don't think a cheeseburger will do it. She needs something that will go down her stomach and stay there. I recomand some koshari, ma7shi and de2eyet bamia bela7m eldani (all egyptian food you can't breathe after eating, so no throwing up)


At 7/05/2005 03:24:00 PM, Blogger gatorbait said...

Sam, I think you should offer yourself to her , and then, when she is totally in your thrall, feed her.

At 7/05/2005 03:25:00 PM, Blogger The Sandmonkey said...


Mestekah: Lol at de2eyet bamia bela7m eldani! You know, i've never actually had that , because it always sounded soo heavy!

Gatorbait: She is way too skinny for my taste. I like some meat on my woman!

At 7/05/2005 04:38:00 PM, Blogger gatorbait said...

Sam, once she is under your influence, she'll see the error of her skinny ways , and grow back into her former voluptuous self. You have the power, man.

At 7/06/2005 01:37:00 PM, Blogger stefania said...

Dear, please forward and spread the word. I got an email from a group of African activists who are gonna found an association named "Making Dictatorship History".

Read here ( scroll down ):


At 7/06/2005 10:06:00 PM, Blogger Mister Ghost said...

Lindsay Lohan is a heifer. She needs to lose a good 30 pounds, so she's just skin. Then we can stick a helium hose up her ass and inflate her up to balloon size and parade her down New York
during the Thanksgiving Day parade.

At 7/06/2005 10:09:00 PM, Blogger Mister Ghost said...

Hey, I used parade as both a noun and a verb. Whew, I'm good.


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